Important point of fact re: running

After my usual Wednesday off from the gym (and on the couch with a pizza), it was back to the gym tonight. I wasn't terribly excited about it, as my legs are still stiff and aching from the training session on Monday, but these pounds aren't going to lose themselves.

I talk a lot here about how much I love running and my evolution into a person who enjoys flailing around and sweating a lot.

But there's an important point to be made, which applies to tonight's treadmill session, and that point is this:

Some nights, running really sucks.

I can always tell within the first minute or two if it's going to be a good run. The first two minutes should be particularly effortless. I should be able to smile (and mean it).

This did not happen tonight.

What did happen is as follows:

I got to the gym and immediately noticed that it was warm. And humid. It was infinitely cooler outside, and why they didn't just pop the doors open for a little relief, I don't know. But the weather inside the gym was more suitable for an afternoon shopping, maybe a Mai-tai by the pool.

I warmed up on the treadmill and the walking felt good. Better than I thought it would, anyway. My hip flexors were loose and my quads - which are still suffering from Monday - only bothered me for a few minutes.

I decided that I wanted to go for two miles today, and when I picked up a jog, I went for the pace I ran on Sunday. Faster than I usually do, but it worked last time, so why not?

Within a minute and a half, sweat was starting to trickle down my temple. My breathing was already becoming labored, like I was trying to breathe in a sauna. The air felt thick.

I almost quit then. I was a very unhappy woman.

But I dug in and soldiered on. I accepted that I wouldn't be setting any records and settled in for what would probably be a slow two miles.

It felt absolutely horrible. It never got easier. I took slower intervals and kept them strictly to two minutes of running only. I labored my way through a 12:20 mile and 25:30 for two.

In retrospect, it makes me giggle happily that these can be considered slow. Aha.

I briefly considered, at the end, going for a 5k, but decided that little good would be gained from it. I really wasn't feeling great about it and was tired of gasping like a fish.

Running feels this way sometimes. Things just get out of sync, my body doesn't cooperate, the circumstances aren't right. Whatever the cause, some runs - like this one - feel like an absolute train wreck. There's nothing I can do about it except learn from it. Strategize. File away whatever knowledge I may have gained from this experience and keep it for when I need it.

And I did learn a thing or two. I learned that I can still function when circumstances make me want to go home and eat a cookie. I learned that, even when I'm breathing heavily, the rest of my body is still working just fine. I learned that I can still finish, even if it takes longer than I wanted it to.

I learned that I need to bring a towel to the gym, 'cause yikes.

This journey is long. There will be lots of days that don't go well, but there will be lots more that do.

Hoping that tomorrow is one of those.